Monday, November 9, 2015

This world and You

"Prerna thought she will buy the box of nutella herself. For she was hungry for some chocolate!"

It is beautiful how we all live in a certain kind of interconnectedness, without the knowledge of it. We are bound by this cosmos which allows us to do actions but we somehow are responding to some kind of equilibrium. Today, I am laughing but somewhere around the corner someone is crying. Today you get married, and someone has had their first visit to a divorce counsellor. Thousands die and thousands take birth on the same day.

I am walking down the street, listening to music and someone is fighting in a corner of a street. I lower the volume, pass them by. I hear 'You don't understand' only, and the look on the man's face is despondent. I hear two men talking in Tamizh in a rickshaw- I smile, listening to your mother tongue in a different place always fills you with a weird kind of joy. I pass by a woman who is talking on her phone who is telling to the other side of the call "Punjabi Ladki hoon, mujhe dar nahi lagta!". I smile, for some inane reason. As I walk past I see two kids of my age smoking, a whole montage of people who I know who smoke passes my mind, and I fight a lot of judgemental opinions that my brain creates. At the same time I see a 10 year old selling ciggarettes, with such informative vigour. And I am witnessing all of this while having a whole life my own, and I am being witnessed at the same time. Someone saw my hair, someone saw my cellphone, someone saw my eyes. Someone did not look at me at all.

Almost always, what we do is a reaction to what is happening somewhere else. It might seem like an overstretched thought but coming to think of it, the world's stasis is possible only if we are acting in accordance to some kind of equalizing structure. It fills a certain kind of optimism in me- that today's tear can turn into a smile soon enough to balance it out.

All this, comes in my mind while going to buy a box of nutella- an impulsive decision taken sitting in the college canteen, wanting to eat something inordinately sweet. The impulsive decision connected me to Virginia Woolf's first sentence in Mrs Dalloway: Mrs Dalloway thought she would buy the flowers herself. Certain sudden impulsive decisions could always make you learn a lot you signed up for. I learnt that no matter how lonely you feel, your very being is made up of this world you live in. 

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